In which I figure out what Avril Lavigne's problem is

So I guess absolutely everyone who has access to the internet and understands English knows this already: Avril is being sued for plagiarism. This makes me feel good in a way. In Uni if you're caught plagiarising, the worst that can happen to you is being kicked out of Uni. I guess being kicked out of Uni isn't as bad as being sued. Nah, Avril's rich, she can pay for that when she lose the case. If I get kicked out of my course it would be the end of me.

In case you've been in a hole these past months and cannot be bothered with searching up all the blog buzz about this, here's a quick recap. In May, Avril Lavigne (AL) and her co-songwriter (some guy) were sued by an obscure 1970s band (the Rubinoos) for sounding suspiciously like their song "I wanna be your boyfriend" on her song "Girlfriend". You can judge it for yourself by watching the following clip.

Naturally, Avril denied the claim. Which is quite understandable, she was probably a follicle back when The Rubinoos were crooning "I wanna be your boyfriend". Besides, the 2 songs don't sound that much alike. However, this led to more claims (only one more actually) of plagiarism. This time another AL's song sounds exactly like a Peaches' song.

This time AL can't use the "never-heard-of-[insert name]" approach anymore. She incriminated herself stated in an interview this month that Peaches' "I'm the kinda" was her no. 1 inspiration. A better explanation would be "I got so inspired that I copied the song, you know, if imitation is the best form of flattery or whatever then copying the whole thing is like totally digging it right?".

To fabricate some semblance of "balance" into this completely one-sided report rant on AL, here are some clips of other people "copying" AL for a change. I guess I can only say "what goes around comes around".



Ok, I guess that wasn't a very quick recap was it. Anway, I've made up my mind about this whole affair. I think Avril didn't plagiarise intentionally. I think the explanation is quite simple really: she's not quite bright. My proof?
1. Anyone with half a brain wouldn't wanna look like some sort of Paris Hilton - Jessica Simpson cross like the picture on the left. I rest my case.

2. What is the logic behind "Sk8er boi", Einstein? I know it's txt speech, I can deal with abbreviating 2 letters into 1 number for "sk8er". But what is the deal with "boi"? the number of buttons you have to press is the same. For "boi" you have to press the number 4 button 3 times to get to the "i", for "boy" you have to press the number 9 button exactly 3 times to get to the "y". Unless there is a way enter the "i" on number 4 first, I don' see any short cut in using "i" instead of "y". Even if there is a shortcut, I'll choose "boy" over "boi" any day. I guess I'm not a text savvy person, I'm too anal on correct spellings and other grammatically correct shit (note, not to be applied to my blog posts, I'm a hypocrite that way, sue me, besides, one can't be grammatically correct when one rants). I always spend a few seconds decoding my messages, so there you have it.

3. She rhymes "home" with "home". Enough said.

I wouldn't go as far as calling her Avril Latrine though. There's something too childishly cruel about name calling like that. The furthest I would go is: "Avril, you're not in my top 10 Canadian artists list anymore". She's still in my top 100 Canadian artists though, simply because I don't know more than 100 artists from Canada. Back in 2002 she was number 1, when one is presented with the choice between Avril Lavigne and Celine Dion and one is an impressionable teenager it wouldn't be hard to figure out which one is chosen. When I come to think about it, I would still choose Avril Lavigne over Celine Dion now. Nothing to do with Celine Dion obvious singing talent though (I'm not being sarcastic now). That woman is just crazy.

what's so fascinating about the Emmy?

Truevil watch Grey's anatomy. It's a rather new fact coz all of truevil's friends seem to think that truevil doesn't watch TV full stop. Anyhow, truevil does watch TV shows, anything that's intelligent and has an actual script. Truevil hates anything that's without a script, i.e. those bloody unrealistic "reality" TV shows and what Truevil hates most of all is shows without a script that involves celebrities i.e. bloody dancing with the stars, skating with the stars, celibrities overhaul, celebrities circus, celebrities doing the normal-people-stuffs and the up and coming "how do celebrities use the toilet". Some of those "celebrities" people aren't exactly qualified to be celebrities. Politicians aren't supposed to be celebrities, they're politicians, they lie, sometimes, to get voted and hence famous in a sense but they are NOT celebrities in my book. Celebrities should be used for someone in the Entertainment industry only, like those people flocking up to awards in weird dresses that they think look great. Like those people on the Emmy awards last night.

 

Truevil isn't a great fan of watching awards night on free-to-air TV. In fact, truevil doesn't like any type of awards presenting ceremony except those that truevil will definitely have to accept an award. Yes, truevil boycott any awards night that truevil aren't nominated coz truevil thinks that it's a waste of time going there, sitting there for the night, watching other people accepting awards. Truevil has to have some motivation to watch or go to such ceremony. However, truevil tuned in yesterday to watch the Emmy during the various advertisement breaks throughout the duration of Grey's anatomy.

 

So while watching the Emmy, truevil couldn't help but wondering why on earth anyone would want to watch this pretentious crap. Everyone who rocked up wanted to get some trophies home. The winners, or rather the ones to whom the trophies went to, couldn't really obvously try to rub their winnings under the noses of the losers, or rather the ones to whom the trophies didn't go to. And the losers had to act like they were so glad that the best actors/actresses won and not them. There were great performances by the losers. And truevil meant that they didn't break down and cry or jump on stage and punch the winner in the face because they didn't get the bloody trophies they were nominated for.

 

What was even more mind bloggling is the concept of "beautiful". The people who interview celebrities arriving on the red carpet just keep saying that people they were interviewing were beautiful or looking fantastic even though they look absolutely horrible. How could someone who is supposed to be a sixty-year-old woman and who had, obviously, too much plastic surgery look "beautiful"? She looked absolutely plastic. Her face looked like that of a thirty-year-old woman, all thanks to her plastic surgeon of course, and her neck looked like a wrinkled sultana. What the hell is beautiful there? Why can't these people age normally? Why do they have to hold on to youthful appreances?

 

Truevil heard from somewhere that the red carpet part is usually the part when most people are interested in and truevil just can't understand it? What's so goddamn interesting about people with plastic faces who wears expensive clothes that they didn't have to pay for?